Chapter Three
Undertaker, Kurt Angle, Christian, Bubba Ray Dudley and Kevin Nash were all in the ring, doing some push-ups. “97, 98, 99,” Undertaker counted. “100!” Kurt exclaimed and dropped flat on his stomach, his cheek on the canvas. Bubba, Christian and Kevin stopped as well, relieved that they reached the 100. The 3 of them sat on the canvas, their knees slightly pulled up to their face. Undertaker took in a deep breath. “Ok, another 100, lets go!” he ordered. Kurt let out a loud whimper.
“Body…….dead……not…….responding………no………more,” he pleaded. Kevin, Christian and Bubba nodded their heads in agreement. But Undertaker refused to stop. “Come on guys, we have a huge match tomorrow,” Undertaker said. Kevin tiredly laughed. “Mark, if we do just 1 more push-up, we wont even live to see this match,” Kevin said. Undertaker glared at him. “Yeah well, judging by who you are facing in your Survivor Series match, you need no training. But we have to face Team Lesnar! That’s 1800 pounds of fat and shit!” Mark said.
Christian, Bubba and Kevin laughed, but Kurt was still flat on his face. “I want my milk,” Kurt grunted. Christian looked at him. “First you wanted Rey, now you want milk. Kurt would you make up your mind already!” Christian exclaimed. Kurt glared at him. “Christian! Do you really want to run down the highway again!” Kurt yelled. Christian laughed. “You know you want me Angle,” Christian taunted. Kurt got up and started to go after him. “Bastard!” Kurt yelled going after Christian, but Kevin held him by his foot, making Angle fall face first on the mat.
“Come on Angle! Show me how much you love to run behind me,” Christian teased. Kurt tried to crawl out of the ring, but Kevin held him back. “Get your ass here you CLB!” Kurt yelled. Christian raised his hands as if he just one a match. “Yes, Christian Loves Blonds,” he proclaimed. Bubba snickered. “You mean Creepy Little Bastard” he said. Christian looked at him. “Hey! I thought we were bashing on Kurt!” Christian pouted. Kevin laughed. “How could we pass up the opportunity when it presented itself?” Kevin said. Christian pouted, but came back in the ring.
“Ok, lets start training!” Mark ordered. But the guys weren’t listening. “I said lets go!” Mark said. Bubba sighed. “Come on man, just 10 minutes,” he pleaded. Mark sighed and nodded his head. He didn’t want to admit it, but he was exhausted himself. “Ok, but only 10 minutes,” he said. Mark sighed and laid flat on the canvas. “We are in for a lot of hell tomorrow night,” Kevin said, stretching his arms. Bubba nodded. Christian laughed. “Well look on the bright side. If Kurt flashes team Lesnar with his thong, they will all run away and forfeit the match,” Christian joked. Kurt immediately covered his butt with his hands, sitting on his hands.
“You seriously have an obsession with my butt, don’t you?!” Kurt grunted. Mark, Kevin and Bubba roared with laughter. “Knock it off Angle,” Christian said. Kurt merely laughed. Bubba started to clap. “Finally! A point for Kurt,” he said. Kurt stood up and took a bow. “Thank you, thank you,” he said. They laughed for a moment, then it was silent. “So what do we do now?” Kevin sighed. Mark turned his head. “If anybody says Truth or Dare, I will break your neck,” Mark huffed. Kevin laughed. “Truth or Dare,” Kevin said. Mark glared at him. “You jus want me to hurt you, don’t you?” Mark said.
Kevin slid out of the ring and ducked down. “You can’t see me, you can’t see me. You can’t hurt me if you can’t see me,” Kevin said. All of them burst out laughing, even Mark. “You all are a bunch of idiots, did you know that?’ a female voice said. They all looked at the ramp, smiling at the sight. Dawn Marie, Lita, Trish Stratus, Molly and Stephanie McMahon came walking down the ramp, shopping bags and pizza boxes in hand.
“Oh dear, the shopping bags!” Mark exclaimed. All the other guys shook their heads. “Only in Chicago will the malls be open till late in the night for women,” Bubba sighed. All the girls entered the ring and went to their men. Lita straddled Christian’s hips, kissing him passionately. Christian nearly fell over on his back. “Get a room, will you,” Kurt said. Christian broke the kiss, and looked at Kurt. “Care to join us?” Christian said. Bubba laughed. “That’s a point for Creepy here!” Bubba said. All the girls laughed. Stephanie, Dawn and Molly seated themselves between their lover’s leg, and Trish laid her head on Bubba’s lap.
“So what are you guys doing?” Trish asked. Kevin grunted. “Waiting for Mark to kill us with more training,’ he sighed. Stephanie pinched Mark’s cheek. “Trying to kill them honey,” Stephanie asked. Mark just smiled. “Please tell me you brought some food babe,” Kurt said. “Yeah, I second that,” Kevin said. Trish crawled to the middle of the ring, and took out the pizza boxes. “There……..food,” she said. All the guys immediately crawled to the food, except Christian. He was still practically having sex with Lita right then and there.
At the smell of the cheese, Christian broke the kiss and whispered “I’m hungry” against Lita’s lips. “Wow isn’t that the most romantic thing you ever heard Dawn? How would you like it if in the heat of passion I say ‘I’m hungry to you?” Kurt laughed. Bubba laughed again. “Another point for Kurt!” he said. All the girls looked confused. “I’m not even going to ask,” Stephanie said, leaning back to rest against Mark’s chest. “So what are we doing tonight?” Molly asked, playing with Kevin’s hand.
“I think it is better if we stay here and train. I don’t want to give A-Train the chance to even touch me with his hairy ass,” Mark shuddered. Bubba, Kevin and Christian laughed. “God, what am I happy that I don’t have to fight a beast in our match,” Bubba said. Christian shook his head. “Then what is Mark Henry?” he said. Bubba eyes widened. “Oh yeah,” Bubba shuddered. Kevin laughed. “Can’t forget the steroid freak Steiner,” Kevin added. Bubba’s eyes widened more. “Oh yeah,” he said again.
“Ok guys, we are going to help you train,” Molly said. She stood up and looked at Kevin. Kevin started to laugh. “No need for that,” Christian said. “Why not?” Dawn asked. Christian smiled. “We don’t want to hurt you guys,” he said. Stephanie placed her hands on her hips. “And what is that suppose to mean?” Stephanie said. Christian smirked. “Face it girls, this is not a bra and panties match. This is actual wrestling,” he concluded. Trish got up. “Oh dear,” Kevin said, and slipped out of the ring. “Good luck CLB,” Bubba said slipped out as well.
Christian suddenly felt weak, being the only gut in the ring with 5 angry divas. “Why don’t you put your money were your mouth is?” Molly challenged, putting her hands over her chest. “Good luck little one,” Mark sighed. “Fine, if you girls can pin me, you win. $100,” Christian said. But Dawn shook her head. “No money, this is for respect. If we win then…….then……umm…….you have to play truth or dare!” Dawn said, pointing her finger at him. Kurt jumped up on the apron.
“Don’t you dare say yes you bastard!” Kurt said. Molly looked at him. “It’s either that or spin the bottle,” Molly said. Kurt jumped back down, cursing under his breath. “Fine! You’re on! But if I win, then you girls are at our mercy tonight!” he said. Stephanie smirked. “Aren’t we always?” she seductively said, looking at Mark. Christian gulped, suddenly feeling helpless.
Dawn smiled and crept up behind him. She drop kicked him from behind, followed by being bulldogged by Trish. Christian jumped in the corner, trying to breath. Molly saw this as her opportunity, and did the backhand stand elbow thing. Christian wobbled to the middle of the ring and gave him a hard bitch slap. Lita followed by ending it with a Litacarana off of the top turnbuckle. Lita went for the pin. “1, 2, 3,!” Stephanie counted.
The other 4 guys entered the ring. “Nice work doofus,” Bubba groaned. Christian held the back of his head. “How was I supposed to know they could fight?” Christian groaned. Kevin laughed. “I could of told you that,” she said, wrapping his arms around Molly’s waist and kissing her softly. “Ok, time to play Truth or Dare!” Lita exclaimed, helping Christian up. All the guys groaned. “Do we have to?” Mark groaned. Stephanie smiled and gently bit his lower lip. “Yes,” she whispered against his lips. All the guys seated themselves the girls sitting between their legs. “Seeing how Lita pinned him, Lita you go first,” Molly said, pulling out the bags of chips and popcorn. “I see you came prepared. Have you girls been planning this all along?” Mark said. Dawn smiled at him. “Oh we hoped for it,” she slyly said. “Women,” Kevin sighed. Molly opened the bags and passed then around.
“Ok Bubba, truth or dare,” Lita asked with a mouth full of popcorn. “Truth,” Bubba said. Lita smiled. “That WASSUP move you guys do on the top turnbuckle, how in the hell did you come up with that? You do fall face first in the guys………” Lita giggled. Bubba sighed. “Well, Back when Benoit, Eddie and me were training in the locker room one day, we heard some noise. We opened the door and saw Vince McMahon getting that move from that diva Sunny as foreplay. I’ll never forget that,” Bubba shuddered. Stephanie spat all her soda out of her mouth.
“OK.OK, THAT WAS AN OVERSHARE, I DIDN’T NEED TO KNOW THAT!,” she blurted out. All the girls started to laugh. Bubba let out a deep sigh. “Dawn, truth or dare?” she asked the pretty brunette. “Truth,” she said, reaching for a can of soda. Bubba put up an evil grin. “How many thongs does Kurt own?” Bubba laughed. Dawn opened her mouth to speak, but Kurt covered her mouth with his hand. “Don’t answer that,” he said. Dawn raised her eyebrow and bit his finger. Kurt yelped and sucked on his bit finger. “More than Lita, that’s for sure,” Dawn said. Lita burst out laughing. “Well, that’s a lot,” she managed to say.
Dawn smiled. “Ok, Kevin, truth or Dare?” Dawn asked. Kevin thought for a moment. “Dare,” he said. Dawn thought for a moment. “Remember that thing that happened to Scott on Halloween?” Dawn said. Kevin nervously nodded his head. “Well, we are going to do it again,” she said. Kevin got a wicked smile on his face. He flipped up his cell-phone and dialed Scott’s number. A few seconds later he started talking. “Scott quick!! Go hide in the closet! Aliens are after you!” Kevin yelled and put down the phone. All of them roared with laughter.
Kevin finally caught his breath. “Stef babe, Truth or Dare?” he asked. Stephanie took some chips. “Truth,” she said. Kevin taught for am moment. “Tell the truth. What was going through your mind when Mark nearly married you in that black wedding years ago?” Kevin asked. Stephanie bit her lower lip and closed her eyes. “That I can’t wait to show him my inner devil when we got to the bedroom,” Stephanie admitted. All the girls clapped their hands. “Bravo girl, I would of thought the same thing,” Molly said.
The all looked at Molly. “Well aren’t you a she-devil Ms. Holly,” Bubba said. Molly gave him a smile. “Yeah, Spike can tell you all about it!” she added. Kurt gasped. “I think they should put a warning sign up on this game. Too much information going around here,” Kurt said. Dawn slapped his shoulder. Stephanie took in a deep breath. “Christian, Truth or Dare,” Stephanie asked. Christian thought for a moment. “Dare,” he said, in an effort to look brave. “Ok, pull your pants down,” she said. Christian looked confused.
“Why?” he asked. Stephanie smiled. “You are always teasing Kurt about his thongs, so lets see yours,” she said. Christian hesitated for a moment, but lowered the rim of his pants. Kurt’s eyes widened at the sight of the rim of the thong. “I knew it! I knew it! You have on a thong!” Kurt screamed, jumping up and down like a 3 year old that just saw Santa Clause. Christian got angry. “You have one on too!” he screamed. Kurt smiled and dropped his pants.
“Does this look like a thong?!?” Kurt screamed, shaking his butt in Christian’s direction. He was wearing a pair of Hanes underwear. “You bastard!” Christian screamed. Kurt slipped out of the ring, heading for the ramp. “You know you want me!” Kurt teased. Christian ran behind him. “You can’t see me! You can’t see me!” Kurt screamed when he was backstage. Bubba shook his head. “And bring back some cheesecake!” Mark called out.
“So who goes next?” Stephanie asked. Mark shrugged. “Molly the little she-devil, Truth or Dare?” Mark asked. “Truth,” Molly said. Bubba snickered. “Figures, women are too scared to choose dare,” Bubba said. Lita looked at him. “No, just too lazy,” she said. Trish laughed at this, knowing it was true. “Ok, Tell Kevin something you have only told me,” Mark said. Molly’s eyes widened. “Mark, please,” she said. But Mark shook his head. “Go ahead Molly, it’s ok,” he said.
Trish, Lita, Dawn and Stephanie watched Molly curiously, not knowing what was going on. Molly let out a shaky breath. She turned around and grabbed Kevin’s hand, placing it on her stomach. “Kevin, I’m pregnant,” she said. Kevin smiled widely, not believing the good news. All the other divas smiled as well, tears forming in their eyes. “Oh my god,” Trish gasped. “So hold up, you told Mark before you told me?” Bubba exclaimed. Mark laughed. “Yeah, I’m special,” Mark said.
Bubba got up and went to Mark. “Yeah, I’ll show you how special you are,” Bubba said. Mark slipped out of the ring, and Bubba ran after him. All the girls smiled at this. Lita suddenly picked up a little box. “This fell out of Bubba’s pocket,” Lita said, handing the box to Trish. Trish opened the box and gasped. It was a diamond engagement ring. Trish started to cry. “Geez, this game really needs a warning sign,” Dawn said. All the girls smiled. Molly and Kevin were still making out.
“I am going to be the godmother,” Stephanie sighed. Trish shot her a look. “No, I am,” she said. Dawn placed her hands on her hips. “No, I am!!” she exclaimed. All of them started to chase each other around the ring. Molly just smiled and looked at Kevin. “I love you,” she whispered. “I love you too,” he whispered back.
“I am!” Lita screamed, grabbing Trish by her hair.
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