(*Note: Over the last couple issues of Mollyopoly, I have made ever-frequent references to Penny Dreadful and Jillian Hall. There is a point to this. Firstly, I am sincere in whatever I say about them. Secondly, I think these two ladies are extremely attractive, especially Penny, who would be described by a significant portion of American society today as just fat. Nothing else would matter, she would just be fat, and there would be no REAL place for her in today's major wrestling outlets. This is ridiculous.)
In Mollyopoly # 7, I came up with a few different ways the WWE could re-package Molly, or at least some different ways that she could be used on television. These were all just random thoughts. Now, I will (attempt) to piece it all together. In Mollyopoly # 8, here is one of the different ways I would use her right now, if I were booking Raw (I will focus on one thing a week...I could run out of material quickly if I don't!): Before I get to that, though:
THE WHOLE SHALAM
Molly Holly is not your run-of-the-mill heel. No...if you are going to take a mark approach to this, and I will here, just to (hopefully) make a point, then here goes: If you look at all the different characters she has portrayed over her WWF/WWE run-from the 'country-bumpkin' Molly; to the sugar-sweetness of the Spike/Molly 'puppy-love' angle;to her epic run as the super-heroine sidekick of The Hurricane;to her run as the 'prudish' Molly and lastly, her current incarnation as the 'butch/jezebel(?)' Molly-one would see a handful of constants:her character has always been portrayed as naive; she always comes across as 'cute and cuddly' (no matter how hard the WWE tries to get her over as otherwise. I think it's her voice or something, I don't know. She is still a badass...but a new and unlikely variation on a theme...the 'cute and cuddly badass');she has always stood firm in her 'beliefs' and 'convictions' ; she has always been spunky; and she has ALWAYS had a righteous motive behind any heel act she has ever committed. I dare say that she COULD be, if booked correctly, the most 3-dimensional character the WWE has had since Mick Foley...I think she has that much range and talent. So taking all this into account, I figured that maybe the psycotic Molly of recent isn't the way to go. I don't know about you guys-if anybody even reads this stuff at all-but when I see Molly on T.V., when something 'bad' happens to her, I slip into mark-mode, and just want to go run out there and hug her. I AM PATHETIC. Well, that is ACTING, people. ACTING and PRESENCE, which Nora Greenwald seems to have a bit of. She is almost the Holly Hunter or Emily Watson of the WWE in this regard. She has a quiet, vulnerable presence...but she is no pushover. Taking this into account, the fact that you could write real, hard-hitting T.V. that could address women as something more than mindless sex-objects with a very talented and well-rounded performer, would-in theory-make her a bookers' dream.
NORA, THE HAIRSPRAY QUEEN: WAYS TO KEEP NORA ON TELEVISION WHEN SHE ISN'T WRESTLING
Well, as long as she isn't going to get a push as a baldie, then maybe the WWE should give Nora the dignity of letting her grow her hair back while on some kind of hiatus (maybe like what is happening now?) and bringing back a fully-haired and ready for action Molly. And what to do with her when she comes back? Well, let's see: Molly vs. Trish. Been there. Done that. Molly vs. Lita. Done already. Molly vs. Victoria. Uncle!!! No mas. It is possible to keep her on T.V. without her actually working, or even performing in a valet/manager role. This is actually a good spot to air some promo segments from her, maybe sort of like the Randy News Network of old. Wheeeee!!! Let's begin.
1) MOLLY HOLLY, WWE AMBASSADOR
When you have the presence and comedic flair of Nora Greenwald, this could be easy money right here. Molly Holly, WWE Goodwill Ambassador. Let's dip into storymode here: Bischoff is intent on making his brand the dominant brand. But SD has ambassadors like Torrie Wilson, Kurt Angle, and Vince McMahon has been virtually exclusive to SD since the roster-split. So who is Raw's ambassador? Enter Molly. Molly should volunteer for this role, and this would continue the weird chemistry Bisch and Molly have. It could also re-establish credibility immediately for Molly...formally aligning her with a top heel like Bisch. Molly should also volunteer, so it would be obvious that Bisch didn't go seeking HER out. You could play on Bisch's ruthless, manipulative heel character and Mollys' youth and naivete, by making it seem as though Bisch gave her the ambassador role simply to get Molly out of his hair. You could even make it seem like Molly were carrying a torch for Bisch. Who knows what could work in this scenario. Anyway, Molly would use her role to speak publicly at conventions, at schools, colleges, big sporting events...whatever, just as long as she is out doing what ambassadors do. Now, the rest is dependent on whether she would be a heel, a face, or a tweener. If she is going to be actually 'involved' with Bisch, that would make an initial heel run with a babyface turn as the result of some Bisch screw-job the most likely. Of course, he would give her the job just to be rid of all her complaining (in the storyline) about not getting a shot at the Women's Title, so she could play the role of the unwitting babyface just as well here. If she were a heel, we would play up her 'pure and wholesome' prudish, spinster-like image. She would berate college students for their spring-break antics or their low grades...whatever. She could get on the female students for using their 'feminine wiles' to skate by in college. She could visit classes of 1st and 2nd graders, and beat them over the head with her 'wholesome' shtick and get on the parents for not teaching their children good, wholesome family values. She could do it all. She could be at the NBA Finals RIGHT NOW, talking to random Pistons or Lakers, and getting their take on her favorite subject: Family values, and abstinence. As a heel ambassador, she would be more like the haughty, angry, self-righteous Molly we saw in her 2nd title run when she cut her promos. If she were a face, we could do the same thing...we would just be playing up the naive traits of her character. She would look slightly 'overmatched' in every interview, and she would play the role of the shy, naive 'good-girl.' In all cases, either heel or face, she would show NO SKIN, she COULD be dressed very prudishly, like a librarian or something, OR she could just wear the flattering get-ups she always wears when she is not wearing her wrestling garb...and she would (preferrably) be wearing glasses. We're trying to present an image here, without making her look COMICAL. I think Nora could pull this off. I also think it could make for some good T.V. I'm gonna quote Reggie Bannister from the 1st 'Phantasm' movie: 'I can see it...I can see it ALL now...'
This also would put her in a speaking role with potentially the whole Raw-or even the whole WWE-talent base. It could set up some interesting give-and-takes. Can you imagine Molly trying to set the Rock straight on his whole Hollywood run? Can you see her trying to have an intelligent discourse with Eugene...or John Cena? Can you see her trying to AVOID that BIG interview with Charlie Haas, Miss Jackie and....Rico? Know what I think? See previous Reggie Bannister quote.
MOLLY HOLLY, WWE TALK-SHOW HOST
Chris Jericho has his 'Highlight Reel.' It would be easy for Bisch to relieve Y2J of his host duties for a while as part of the whole Y2J/Christian/Trish/Tomko affair. It would also be easy for him to put Molly in this role...again, to get her out of his hair. Again, Molly would function best as a heel here, and would be in a speaking role with potentially the whole Raw roster. RVD was the 'Whole Dam Show,' but Molly could be the 'Wholesome Show' (if only RVD were on Raw; Molly could finally get to the bottom of '4:20'). Again, I see potential money here. The weekly interview segment could be backstage or in the ring. I would try something different than the Highlight Reel, and would put it backstage. Something comfy and homey. Something that looks like what would happen if Nellie Olson from Little House on the Prairie were to ever get a talk-show. You could run an angle where Molly became awestruck with the 'power' that Bisch would have given her, by giving her a weekly interview segment, and became a stereotypical self-absorbed talk-show host. This could be an interesting addition to her characters' laundry list of traits...the naive country-bumpkin playing at being a bad-girl trying to look classy while conducting an interview with the biggest and best of Raw. Can you see her with her decorators, trying to get everything just right for a big Evolution interview? Can you see her interviewing Victoria? A heel Trish Stratus? The World Heavyweight Champion, Chris Benoit? I can. In this scenario, Molly would have to have her hair back at it's pre-Wrestlemania 20 length, and she would be dressed much like a female talk-show host.
Now, in all of these situations, she would not be WRESTLING, and would NOT be associated with Gail Kim, which would be good for Gail...to establish herself on her own and keep it as fresh as possible. The Molly/Gail partnership is almost a year old. She is still on television, her character and her face is still out there, she would be working with some of the top guys in angles and promos, and she could heal up in the meantime...if that is why she has been on Raw once in the last 4 weeks. I am still really high on the Molly vs. The Fans angle I came up with in M-poly # 7, but I think either one of these two scenarios give Molly a chance to do some serious stuff as well as some comedy, which Nora likes better anyway. These two scenarios are also probably a little bit better.
THE COMEDOWN
(*Note: If there is any truth at all behind some recent reports of Ivory and Jacqueline physically and verbally abusing some of the female talent at OVW, then I am officially done with BOTH of them. Penny Dreadfull and Jillian Hall still rock, and Molly Holly looks a little bit better than J.Lo...but more importantly than that, Molly is better at WHAT SHE DOES than J.Lo is at what she does. Singing? Dancing? Please.)
The WWE may have their YJ-Stinger 'Sting of the Night' ...but I am not to be outdone. I present to you:
The Steak-ums Sting of the Night:
'What? NOOOO!!! What is WRONG with You?!?' Molly in response to some BAD officiating from referee Earl Hebner on 11/02/2003 (Sunday Night Heat) when Ivory kicked out of the Molly-Go-Round.
Sayonara.
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